Sorry it's been a few days since my last post. I hope this one makes up for it. I thought rather than telling what I have been doing the past few days, I would change it up and write more of an "article".
Why have I been coming back to Jamaica for 10 years? On some levels that seems like a simple question to answer, but on others it isn't very easy. If you were to ask me back in 2004, the first year I came down here, if I would still be coming, I would have said my trips would only last for as long as I was a student at Wright State. For those who don't know, my first 3 trips were with Wright State and a group of 20 others. As I stated previously, although I dragged my feet to come back in 2004, some friends talked me into coming, and I realized 3 days into my trip that I wanted to come back again and again.
It was sometime during my 2nd trip that a boy asked me if I could stay for Christmas. He was a boy I had gotten close to. He really missed home and he just wanted someone to spend Christmas with him. I obviously had already made plans to return home with the WSU group and I was not going to be able to stay for Christmas. I told him that, but I said that I could try for the next year.
The year of my third trip was somewhat of a trying time for me being able to come back. In March of that year, Fr. Chris, the Campus Minister at WSU passed away. I vividly remember the night I found out about it. It was a Saturday evening and I was in my apartment at school. Yes, it was a sudden death and it was unexpected, but the thing that bothered me the most was that something inside of me said that I may not get chosen to go back to Jamaica again now that he was gone. The last conversation he and I had one-on-one was during my second trip, he said that he could see me doing mission work once I was done with school since I was so good with the kids. Now that he was gone, there was no one to make sure my name was on the list. It ended up being true that I was not selected initially for the trip since I had already been twice and the trip was so popular that they wanted more people to experience the trip.
I was determined to still make a trip on my own though, for Christmas. I hadn't yet started to make concrete plans for a trip of my own when I got an email one day saying that someone had to back out and that I was next in line. I was so glad to hear that. When I went in right away to pay my deposit, I asked Joan about staying for an additional 2 weeks for Christmas at my own expense. She checked with Mimi and Susan and it ended up being fine, and I did just that.
My trips really have been an evolution over the past decade, and for a while, I never knew if the time I was spending at Bosco would be my last. I can't pinpoint really why I have a longing to come back year after year. I do know that for a little while, I wanted to convince myself that I was making a difference, even though I knew I was. I didn't want to be "just another volunteer". These boys see and meet so many people over the years, and a very large majority of them only come once, so they start to develop a friendship with people only to have the volunteers leave mere days later. I have sometimes thought that it's almost like a zoo: people come to see the kids, experience a little about what they go through, then return to their lives back home. Now I'm not here to judge or to say that the experiences people who visit here have aren't real because they are, I just personally wanted the boys to have some consistency, and I knew that If I came back every Christmas that they could depend on that consistency.
When I first started coming here, I never knew from one year to the next what was happening at Bosco or how the boys were doing. Social Media didn't exist at that time, and even if it were to have existed, the facility definitely wasn't outfitted with the means to be able to keep in touch. The place only had one phone line, and if I wanted to email home, I had to wait in line with the 19 other students after the office closed and write home on the dial-up line that was also the single shared phone line. Fast-forward to now, I can pretty much daily know what is going on with the boys. There is high-speed wireless on the compound, and with the advent of Social Media, I am kept up to date with everything that goes on.
I have also had the privilege to keep in touch with boys who have long left the gates of Bosco because they are now on their own working hard to make a living for themselves. Believe it or not, the first boy I ever met here on the very first day is the one I keep in touch with the most. It has been really great to watch him grow up from a 13 year old boy to now 22 and watch him and help him through his struggles of living on his own. I have seen him learn from his mistakes, and every time I talk to him on the phone, I am so proud of the man he has become. I don't doubt that I have had a strong hand in the person he has become to this day. How powerful is that?
I have seen hundreds of boys come through the gates of Bosco, and for a large majority of them, I don't know what happens to them. They run away, they are sent home, they are kicked out, or whatever. The good ones however, stay, learn a trade, and leave this place with a certificate of training and hopefully get jobs that will better their lives and their family lives. The ones I keep in touch with know that I still come back every Christmas. Now, they come and visit me at Bosco. I know of at least 3 past boys if not more who will be coming back on Christmas to see me. How awesome. I know that some of the boys take my annual visit for granted and see me as just someone who comes and gives them stuff every year, but they eventually realize that my visits are more than that. I could be home for Christmas, but (probably against my family's best wishes) I continue to come back year after year.
I still can't get over the fact that there are about 4 or so boys who have been youth here since before my first trip. 10 years or more is a long time to be here and I have been able to see them grow up from 6-8 year olds into the boys they are now. I can't wait to be able to keep in touch with them once they leave these gates.
My trips here are only usually a little more than 2 weeks a year, but anyone who knows me would think I have lived a lifetime down here. It sure feels like that to me. It is so bizarre how a 2 week annual trip can have such an impact on the way I live my everyday life. I don't think a day passes where I don't talk about "Jamaica this, or Jamaica that". It's not quite to the point of obsession, but some might think that.
As I said before, there was a time when I never knew what year would be my last year, so I always tried to make my trips count, and I tried to spend every waking moment with the boys. I still don't know when my last trip will be if ever, but I don't worry myself with that. I just take each year as it comes to me because I know that I have already personally made a difference in many many lives, and each following year that I am able to continue that is just icing on the cake.
Well, the next few days are important because we will be getting ready for the Christmas Festivities. Coming here now 8 years for Christmas, I know the drill. I have earned my Elf Ears as Santa's Helper and I have really been able to experience the true meaning of Christmas. One could say that it gets very repetitive from Christmas to Christmas, and the pictures I bring back show that...they all look the same each year, just different boys. There is something however that still brings me to tears each Christmas, being able to hand out small gift sacks to the boys full of donated items that most other kids their age would just throw away, and also being able to serve them a big Christmas Lunch. They are so happy and excited for the little things that they get, and it is only on Christmas Day that I am able to see that joy they have knowing that they are getting more here on Christmas than they would if they were not here, and it is such an honour to be a part of that year after year.
In closing, I just want to thank everyone for the support I have gotten over the years. I purposely don't ask people for much help for my trips. They are my trips. I have found that through sharing my experiences, people feel compelled to give, either monetarily or through donations I bring down for Christmas, and I am thankful for that. It is my hope that I can continue to keep coming down here for as long as I am able, be that 1 year more or 10 years more or maybe even 20 years more. I have built friendships and relationships that even if this place isn't around in 20 years, I know I still have a home to return to at Christmas for as long as I am welcome. Good Night. Stay tuned for more about my trip.
Matt's Bosco Blog
Saturday, December 21, 2013
A Reflection on 10 Years at Bosco
Tuesday, December 17, 2013
Bosco 2013 Day 3 and 4
After about an hour or so, I went and got some letters that were sent with me from a previous Wright State student who has been down here. I gave them out to the boys and we sat in the Dining Hall and wrote her letters back. It's kind of a project because some of the boys don't really know how to write. Of those that do, some can't write sentences of their own, but can only copy what has already been written, so I wrote a template for them to copy.
Next came lunch. Some of you (mainly WSU students who have been down here) have asked me what I do for meals. Generally during the week, I eat with the office staff: Sr. Susan, her assistant and the financial officer. Sr. Mimi sometimes joins us too and any other guests who may be here. This year, a friend of Sue's is here, Carolyn Rowland (anyone who's been here remember Carolyn's house? That's her name on the house.) The catering boys fix a little something for us to eat.
In the afternoon I got a group of about 5 boys to help me finish decorating the Rec Room for Christmas. We hang ornaments from the ceiling, which can be a challenge because tape doesn't stick very well and its all concrete, so I usually borrow some double sided foam tape from Sr. Susan and use it sparingly to hang the ornaments. Its the best we can do. After that, we went to the Dining Hall to put up the tree and decorations there too.
Back to meals, sometimes I get to eat with the sisters (and guests) at the convent for supper if they are fixing it that night. Otherwise, I get the same food that is fixed for the childcare and other staff who look after the boys. I just give the ladies my tupperware dish and the put my food in it. Sr. Susan has told me multiple times that I am her easiest guest because she doesn't have to worry about entertaining me. If I am around for a meal that is already being fixed I will eat that, otherwise I will make do. As a last option, I will just eat what the boys eat, which isn't too horrible.
This morning, again I went to the playfield with the boys for a couple of hours. I will admit, as I have in the past, that sometimes it does get boring, but just the fact that I am there with the boys kind of breaks up the monotony anyway. I met a boy who has the same first name as me, which is weird because my name is obviously not very common in Jamaica.
It's interesting to talk to the boys and find out how some are better behaved than others. A question I ask them this time of year is "much pass?" Which means how many times did they pass. They get a pass for each week they have not gotten in trouble either in school or otherwise. For 15 weeks before Christmas they are graded. They have to get enough passes to be able to go home, and another amount to be able to go to Grand Market, and another amount to even be able to see Santa on Christmas Eve. In the past, it seems that a lot of the boys I get closer to seem to be the ones who misbehave the most. This year that is the case, but there are a few who do have "nuff pass".
Something I always enjoyed about when I came here with the Wright State group from 2004 to 2006 was getting to be with the boys on the playfield after our daily activities during their school day. That was when we really got a chance to get to know the boys. A reason I enjoy coming here on my own (for fear of sounding selfish) is because I get to spend lots of time with them on the playfield and I get the attention. Sometimes, however, I get too much attention, but like I said before, it beats the monotony that they usually have.
Today was the Staff Christmas Party. In the afternoon, I stayed with the boys for a little over an hour while the staff arrived down at the Catering Hall. We watched Netflix (thanks to Edney, their computer teacher who hooked it up). Once it was time for the party to start, I left some of the senior boys in charge (per the direction of Susan) to watch the movies with the boys.
It's always fun at the Staff Party. We play Bingo. Mr. Plunkett is always the caller, and he is a character. He is one of the Childcare Staff who has been here for over 20+ years (maybe even closer to 30). It's a lot of entertainment and it is a great time to spend with all of the staff I have met here and the teachers I don't get to see otherwise because school is always out by the time I get down here each year. The Bingo lasted the whole afternoon and into the early evening. That pretty much concluded my day today. We will see what happens tomorrow.
Sunday, December 15, 2013
Bosco 2013 Day 1 and 2
Well I arrived in Kingston around 2:30 yesterday. It was a very smooth trip overall with little to no delays. I was worried at first the night before because it snowed about an inch or so, so I wasn't sure how the airport would be with flight delays, especially at 6 in the morning. It was fine though. When I was in Miami, I did run into Bishop Neil Tiedeman, the Bishop of the Diocese of Mandeville here in Jamaica. He was returning from the states to Jamaica on my same flight. I recognized him, but I don't think he recognized me at first because it was out of context, but he eventually put two and two together and knew me because once he saw me on the plane, he asked if I was going to Mandeville and if I needed a ride. I told him that Susan was sending someone for me, but thanks anyway. I guess it's good to know people in high places.
Customs and Immigration went well. I sometimes get worried, especially when I am going through Customs by myself with 4 bags (2 checked and 2 carry-ons), but it never fails that they ask me what's in my bags, and I say "clothes", which is true. There just happens to be mostly items that I am leaving with the boys as donations too. They don't seem to question me further and they just let me through. When I reached the outside of the airport, Sr. Mimi was there to greet me with 2 boys and of course Doogie.
For those who don't know who Doogie is, he is a 40-some-year old who is mentally handicapped. He was found in Kingston many many years ago and looked like he was eaten by rats. They first thought he looked around 8 or so, but dental records showed that he was in fact 18. He has been at Bosco ever since. Apparently he has been asking/telling everyone he has seen for the past 2 months that he was going to the airport to pick me up. I guess that's what kind of impact coming here for 10 years has, even on Doogie. Now that he came with Mimi to get me, he doesn't stop telling me that he came to get me and how happy he is to see me.
When I finally got to Bosco (did I mention for the 10th year now? My first trip was in 2004 with the Wright State Catholic Campus Ministry), I was pooped. Even though my travels went smoothly, I think the fact that I have been so busy before my trip with work and only a day off between a 2 week trip with work and Jamaica, this is going to be a good rest time too. Mimi told me that the count of boys is down to less than 120 boys. They usually have 150-160. I mentioned that in a way that's a good thing, right? But she said not really because they are staffed for 150 boys and since the government pays them per boy, they aren't getting as much money.
Most of the boys who are here have been here at least since last year. I recognize most of them and they are thrilled to death that I am here, as am I. If you would have asked me 10 years ago if I would still be coming back here for a decade, I would have laughed. I barely wanted to come on my first trip, but it was a few of my WSU CCM friends who talked me into coming. I vividly remember though that the 3rd day into my first trip I said to myself that I would do whatever I can to continue to come back year after year for as long as I can. For a few years, I was treating my trip as if it were going to be my last one because I was never for sure that I would come back again, and that was hard. Now, I just try to make the best of every trip and I know that I will always have family here. There are even people who I don't know who know me and know what I do here, and that speaks volumes to me. This place, even though I only come 2 weeks out of the year, is like a second home to me. I am amazed year after year how that when I return it is as if I never left. The boys pick up conversations right where we left off and tell me things that I have long forgotten. I don't feel like I come here every year to visit these boys, I feel like I am here, living with them for 2 weeks.
I slept in late this morning and was awakened by some boys who Mimi sent down to my house to have me help get the Christmas tree out of storage and put up with the boys. So that's what we did. Their Christmas decorations are getting a little worse for wear, but they are still working. We only got the tree for the rec room put up, and tomorrow I hope to finish decorating the Rec room and then put up the tree in the Dining Hall and decorate that as well. I didn't have the right things today to decorate and when it was time to put the tree up in the dining hall, it was lunch time, so I figured I would wait until tomorrow, plus I wanted to get re-acquainted with the boys on the playfield since I was put to work right away before I even got a chance to really see the boys.
It's been really great to hang out with some of the boys who have been here since my very first year. Yes, there are still boys AT Bosco who have been here for 10+ years. I still do keep in touch with some boys who have aged out and are on their own, and some come back to see me at Christmas, but I even find it hard to believe that some have been here the entire time since at least 2004 or before and are now learning a trade and will soon get a job of their own.
Tuesday, December 25, 2012
Grand Market, Christmas Eve
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Saturday, December 22, 2012
Birthday party, Pat's arrival, and packing presents
Thursday, December 20, 2012
Alpha Day 2 and back to Bosco
As a follow up from the camera workshop I talked about yesterday, Brad Clarke was determined to be the best student of the 15 that participated in the class. Because of that, they gave him his very own camera. It's a nice camera so it seems.
Shortly after this picture, some of the boys went on yet another treat. It seems that at Alpha, the boys are constantly going on treats. There is more opportunity for treats at Alpha because it is in Kingston and more companies and people are willing to donate things or services around the holiday season. Susan has actually had to decline requests for treats for the boys at Alpha because there have been so many.